I am swimming so good!

[st_aurafina]

Thank you to couplagoofs on tiktok, for this 2022 anthem, and apologies to The Mountain Goats.

I'm not drowning
I am swimming so good
I am having a nice time
This is a good afternoon
I don't want to die
I love living

Tiktok is fun? It's supposedly this den of wanton teenage vipers eating their own tails, and that's one part of it, but to be honest the algorithm is quick to figure out what you want and serve that up steadily. It figured out that I want queer-friendly content and random facts. It is proving to be a nice place to take my poor addled brain for a wee rest.


RAT-us Quo
COVID sure is a thing that is happening everywhere? I am having cognitive dissonance between what is happening all around me (lots of COVID, no access to rapid tests) and what the government is telling pharmacists (It's a mild infection! Only the very sick will get very sick!) It's hard not to fall down paranoid rabbit holes. Why are people acting normal? Why is nobody screaming in the streets about this? I don't understand.

I'm boosted, lilacsigil is boosted. We've upgraded to N95 masks. I've stopped going to the gym. We're not planning to go anywhere besides the supermarket and appointments. I don't think there's much else that can be done at this point. Eventually we'll get it. I just hope that it's a long way off, and a variant that's a little closer to my definition of mild than the government's.

*sighs* I am swimming so good.


Reading Wednesday
Finished Reading
The Animals at Lockwood Manor by Jane Healey narrated by Sarah Lambie
- when last we left the reader, she was pondering whether this was a kissing book

- it was, indeed, a kissing book.
- A lady-kissing book
- the burn was slow. Perhaps a little too slow?
- you will like this if you liked the social tension in Rebecca
- or if you like twisting on the end of a hook in an agony of suspense
- it was beautiful. It was lush and loving with words.
- but Hetty doubts herself so much, the story hit my embarrassment squick a lot
- I don't deal well with historically accurate misogyny or homophobia
- but if you do, and you like WWII-era stories about socially awkward lesbians
- you will love this


The Martian, by Andy Weir, narrated by Will Wheaton
- avoided this for a long time because it seemed so... blokey.
- it was blokey in the sense that it was a bloke's story, but it wasn't bro-ey. Okay, not TOO bro-ey.
- there was still obligatory (and arbitrary) het.
- As long as you're hearing first person, it's okay. The third person sections are DIRE af.
- took a minute to get into Will Wheaton's narration, because the last time I heard his voice, it was as a smarmy villain in Leverage
- he did a great job
- kept forgetting this was fiction, the science was so near-future that it all seemed plausible to me
- the story of how this book got written was as interesting as the actual book
- It was a serial! He had an email list!
- I heard about it on the Cracked Spines podcast, but here's the wiki entry: The Martian (Weir Novel)

Horrorstör by Grady Hendrix, narrated by Tai Sammons and Bronson Pinchot
- I read this because Audible Australia didn't have the furniture store book I wanted to read
- which was Finna by Nino Cipri
- one of the reviews of Finna said, in what I imagine was a pissy voice, "Don't you think we've had enough horror stories set in furniture stores?"
- Interesting that they chose to find fault with the queer furniture store story, huh?
- But I was like, this is a genre now? So I looked for others, and found Horrorstör
- it was good? Not amazing, but definitely fun.
- it knew what it was here to do, and it did that well
- The scariest parts were my mental flashbacks to getting lost in Ikea.
- One of those books that is probably better in paper form, because there apparently are graphics to go along with it
- this would enhance the existential horror, I think
- but the voice used at the start of each chapter to narrate the catalogue was delightful


The Dictionary of Lost Words by Pip Williams, narrated by Imogen Sage
- this was free so I read it
- and it wasn't terrible
- but the whole time, I wondered why I was reading
- I don't usually read straight history type fiction
- I did love The Professor and the Madman, by Simon Winchester
- and this lies adjacent to that non-fiction tale of dictionaries
- Esme's father is a lexicographer for James Murray, editor of the OED, and she grows in the scriptorium
- she begins collecting the words that are rejected from the dictionary
- all the dictionary stuff was really interesting, as well as the weird little ecosystem of printers and academics involved in editing the new edition
- but there's one thing I need to learn

- that one thing is remembering that if your character is born around 1890, the Great War is looming over them in adulthood
- this goes about as well as you'd expect
- Esme's ending, though, is really odd and abrupt?
- I get that it's meant to feel real and random. Random terrible things happen to people.
- "And then she got hit by a lorry, the end" is a weird flex
- it all gets tied up in the epilogue
- but it felt like the whole book existed to be tied up in the epilogue?
- in summary, it's an interesting read
- especially if you're into dictionaries and linguistics and the rules of gendered language
- but it felt ungrounded in a way that is hard to explain


The Final Girl Support Group, by Grady Hendrix, narrated by Adrienne King
- DNF
- I wanted to like this, because the premise is clever: final girls in adulthood, dealing with their traumas with other women like them
- Adrienne King is a fabulous narrator!
- the world building was great, especially the creepy media industry that has built up around the women
- in practice, relentless grim existence is not as much fun to read about, you know?

- One of the final girls is nursing her wife through end stage cancer
- I was kinda mad that this happens to the only lesbian characters
- and then there was a prolonged section set in the hospice centre
- so I bailed

- there's a TV series planned, though?
- I would check that out, to be honest. It's a really good premise and maybe it could be done better on screen.

Iron Widow by Xiran Jay Zhao, narrated by Rong Fu
- imagine that I had just stuck my head in a tumble dryer
- and I am now staring at you with wild eyes and hair still sparking
- maybe also a skull fracture
- that is the emotional experience of reading Iron Widow
- it is a hell of a ride
- not once did I manage to predict a plot point
- that might be my inexperience with mecha type stories
- or a general unfamiliarity with the story of Empress Wu Zetian
- but hotdog! This was wild!
- also, you don't see a f/m/m threesome that's, you know, actually a threesome. And they were adorable together. Soft and tender with each other, wielding angry death with everyone else. A lovely dynamic.
- it was a whole lot of righteous anger in a giant fighting bug
- to quote the author, "ENFORCE YOUR LAST PATHETIC GENDER ROLE, PATRIARCHY"


Upright Women Wanted by Sarah Gailey, narrated by Romy Nordlinger
- it's a queer western! A queer western about librarians.
- it's about finding out you're not the only one in the universe who has ~feelings for their best friend
- the world building was understated but I liked that it didn't have to be explained much
- the setting is a post-civilisation dystopia
- our character runs away to join the Librarians, who travel between towns distributing approved reading material, and are very proper. And probably best friends. Look at them holding hands. Best friends for sure.

- the Librarians are actually a queer underground railway, yay!!
- At the start, Esther, the runaway has just seen her lover executed. It happens off-screen, but I think it warrants a warning
- the queer rescue story I didn't know I wanted
- I'd read more in this setting!



Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia, narrated by Frankie Corzo
- This one walks in Dracula's shoes for a while: castle in the mountains, isolated, fog, taciturn staff
- but Noemí is a wonderful protagonist who takes the story in the direction she wants, thank you
- I love that I can almost hear her sigh and shake off her socialite persona because damn it, someone has to save her cousin
- the story takes its time, but in a loving, creepy way. So loving. So very creepy.
- gorgeous language, beautiful things
- there's a certain amount of body horror towards the end

- I swear that fungus is the new horror monster
- there is so so so much fungus
- a plethora of fungus, if you will
- but if you were creepily horrified by the idea of that giant fungus thing in Oregon
- you will definitely like this

- also there are paper dolls!

Dial A for Aunties by Jesse Sutanto, narrated by Risa Mei
- it's a romance! I don't usually read romance
- but the aunties are fantastic, Meddie is fantastic
- I feel like I've been invited into their world so I better be polite
- Meddie's family is Chinese-Indonesian
- Chinese-Indonesian wedding planners
- it's as amazing as it sounds
- When Meddie accidentally kills her blind date on the eve of a big event, she must ask her Ma and Aunties for help
- while still managing to run a socialite wedding smoothly
- the chaos of this eventually got to me and I stopped reading
- this isn't a DNF so much as a DNF-yet
- it says something about how invested I am in these characters that I can't make myself read about them being in danger, you know?
- I will come back to this one when I've calmed down
- it's so good

Curently Reading
Witchmark by C. L. Polk, narrated by Samuel Roukin
- ahahaha it's so gay
- gay wizards even
- "Help me, Starred One!" *giggles with delight at how everything that is*
- so far, it's perfectly tropey, with forced soul bonds and hidden identities and a murder mystery and some kind of expy elf man
- sort of Edwardian setting
- GREAT WAR DAMN IT!
- okay, not THE great war, but it's definitely meant to parallel WWI, all grim and shellshock
- will I ever learn?
- probably not

Next up
Ugh, too many choices:
- Hench by Natalie Zina Walschots - office temp for super villains
- In Deeper Waters by F. T. Lukens - gay gay pirate romance described as "a frothy confection"
- Terra Nullius by Claire G. Coleman - I saw this promoted as "vampirism as metaphor for colonisation" but now I can't find the review, and I'm wondering if that was a spoiler.
- Matrix by Lauren Groff - it's narrated by Adjoa Andoh! But also, it's Marie de France and 12th Century living, and I don't know how grim it is.

Probably frothy gay pirates. Seems the safest.

Comments

[torachan]

The thing about mild cases is that there is a huge variation. There are people who feel super sick but are still considered mild because they weren't hospitalized, but there are also tons of people who have a bit of a cold for a day or two and that's it. Everyone who's been sick at my work with omicron has been the latter.

That said, I still don't want to get it!

[likeadeuce]

That's also my -- purely anecdotal -- sense of omicron. The vaccinated people I know who tested positive in clusters during the current wave truly had a few days of cold symptoms and then felt better. (So far. Knock on wood). "Mild" in earlier waves, and especially pre-vaxx, definitely didn't mean that.

Obviously there are still people getting very ill and I don't want to downplay that.

[kore]

I am having cognitive dissonance between what is happening all around me (lots of COVID, no access to rapid tests) and what the government is telling pharmacists (It's a mild infection! Only the very sick will get very sick!)

SERIOUSLY

I loved the books part of this! It was adorable.

I am really glad you guys are boosted and have N95s. Us too. I'm still petrified most days tho.

[st_aurafina]

Same. *safe distance hugs*

The N95s are much more comfortable than I expected, actually? I like that it never touches my face. Though they get so sweaty, and it's summer, bleh.

[lilysea]

Upright Women Wanted by Sarah Gailey

I really enjoyed this! ^_^

Have you read much of Sarah Gailey's other work?

I thought her hippo series was great!

River of Teeth

Taste of Marrow

[blueswan]

This. Just wanted to add my agreement. I wish she was more prolific. I've loved what I've read of her work.

[sholio]

The Dictionary of Lost Words by Pip Williams

I had a moment of cognitive dissonance before I realized that I was thinking of The Liar's Dictionary, which also involves late-1800s dictionary compilers, and which I bounced off hard due to hating 1/2 of the protagonists as well as the writing style. (I skipped to the end and read the last couple of chapters to see if I was missing anything. I wasn't.) However, I was thinking "Okay, I don't remember any of this, and maybe I should give it another chance" - but no.

[st_aurafina]

There are lots of dictionary novels, apparently? Another sub-genre I wasn't aware of!

[copracat]

All the best for staying safe. I'm lucky enough to work from home so I'm just as locked down as lock down. The assumption that everyone will get it is upsetting. I mean, we were being pretty good at not getting it for a while there. :(

[st_aurafina]

The assumption that everyone will get it is upsetting.
It's so upsetting!! Especially the dialogue that seems to be settling on "You only get really sick if you were sick to start with" which is all kinds of problematic.

I wish I could work from home! It would have suited me quite nicely, and I would have happily swapped with any of the sad extroverts that found it difficult.

[rydra_wong]

COVID sure is a thing that is happening everywhere? I am having cognitive dissonance between what is happening all around me (lots of COVID, no access to rapid tests) and what the government is telling pharmacists (It's a mild infection! Only the very sick will get very sick!) It's hard not to fall down paranoid rabbit holes. Why are people acting normal? Why is nobody screaming in the streets about this? I don't understand.

I think we (people in countries with high vax-and-booster rates) are in a suuuuper weird place with Omicron right now.

SO MANY breakthrough infections, the immune escape is wild. On the other hand, it is genuinely true that for people who are vaxxed-and-boosted and not immunocompromised, a breakthrough infection is almost certainly going to be "mild" (where "mild" means you don't need to go to hospital, but it can be anything from cold to bad flu-level). And if you're one of the unlucky few who needs to go to hospital, it'll probably be "a few days of oxygen then home"; you're still less likely to end up in ICU or on a vent.

Pretty spectacular graph from the UK, where we are now all Omicron all the time: https://twitter.com/PaulMainwood/status/1484208632862584833

On the other other hand, hospital systems are being hammered by sheer numbers of cases, and numbers of staff having to isolate, even if demand on critical care and vent beds is much lower.

And people who are immunocompromised are potentially in as much danger as ever, at least until we can get long-lasting antibody treatments like Evusheld rolled out (and know how well they hold up against Omicron).

(And people who are unvaccinated are in bad trouble, because Omicron does seem to be a notch milder in intrinsic severity than Delta, but that can still fuck you up.)

So -- it's everywhere! But also we're still in a much better position and most of us really are much safer! But also systems are under huge stress! And some people are very endangered! And we don't have clear data re: breakthrough infections and long Covid! And many of our governments are being disasters!

That's a head-fucky situation.

[st_aurafina]

On the other other hand, hospital systems are being hammered by sheer numbers of cases, and numbers of staff having to isolate, even if demand on critical care and vent beds is much lower.
We had one doctor at our rural clinic have to isolate, and you could feel the shudder go through the system as we all heaved to carry the extra overflow. The numbers are so large, I don't think people realise what it means.

And many of our governments are being disasters!
*headdesk* I wish to administer disciplinary headslaps. It would only take a few, surely.

I think we're using sotrovimab here? But it's so good to know that there's something to give high risk patients, before they end up on ventilators.

[out_there]

The frothy gay pirates does sound best.but lesbian cowgirl librarians sounds very appealing too. (I'll have to keep an eye out for that.)

[st_aurafina]

It was fun! And short - the audio was only four hours. I guess it's a novella??? (I do miss out on a lot by not actually holding a physical book in my hands, sometimes.)

[topaz119]

I’m reading Matrix now and it’s dire but very fast-moving and … I’m not exactly sure how to describe it, but she (Marie) is often described as a mystic and a poet, so maybe mystical?

Hench was … maybe not fun, but vastly entertaining, and everyone makes it through the wedding in fine form in DAfA, if that helps!

[st_aurafina]

everyone makes it through the wedding in fine form in DAfA, if that helps!
That helps a lot, actually!! I really want to finish it, but I'm quite tense and anxious at the moment.

I keep hearing great review of Matrix. Maybe I'll save it for a time when I'm a little less tense and anxious. (Some theoretical time in the future which will surely happen. One day.)

[oracne]

I adooooooooooored WITCHMARK. Dial A for Aunties sounds truly excellent.

[st_aurafina]

I adooooooooooored WITCHMARK.
*flails* It's so good and perfect and exactly the thing I need to read right now. I'm excited that there's more books in the series, too.

Dial A for Aunties sounds truly excellent.
It's so good! Very tense, and very, very funny.

[usuallyhats]

That is EXACTLY what reading Iron Widow felt like! What a wild ride.

[st_aurafina]

It was brilliant. Unhinged and brilliant!

[ysilme]

*all the symapthies* *hugs*
Most people I know/meet are indeed acting normal - but with the new normal. For me it's become the new normal indeed, and the only people I perceive as still acting un-normal are the mask refusers and those violently opposing the current rules (which actually are those running through the streets scraming... *sigh* ). But things are likely rather different over here (Germany), as we're currently still having low numbers compared to the rest of Europe around us, free rapid tests aren't an issue and even the self-tests are available again (hadn't been for about three months). Also, at least in my area, despite much higher numbers than even a year ago, the hospitalisation rate is low and we didn't have any deaths for over a week in my county. I notice an increase of people I know being infected (as in, nearly none during the last two years, now three or four families), but all only with very mild progression, whereas numbers clearly show that the only severe cases/cases needing ICU are unvaxxed patients. We're still only at the beginning of omicron over here, but actually the main concern by now is that we might have service outages due to a huge number of workers being in quarantine.
Personally, I feel safer than ever: a good portion of people is boostered (I am, too, hubby not yet because he'd got the J&J vaccine so what used to be his booster shot in December is now considered only the second shot and he'd be boostered only after the next one in March), and rules in general are sensible and are followed to the most part. But I've also been living mostly in self-isolation since the beginning of the pandemic; been only done essential shopping and unavoidable appointments during all the time, and except a short period last autumn when our numbers were very low we also didn't do/go to anything other than that (we've been to the cinema twice, to a restaurant once but nothing else). I'm going to attendance choir practice again since this week, but the restrictions and rules for that are super strict so it feels safe enough.
From my personal POV I can also say that I simply don't have the physical and mental energy any longer to be in a state of exception all the time; I actually needed to lern how to get back to a different normal last year as it was affecting me so badly.

[st_aurafina]

Yeah, I think finding the new normal is definitely the quest we're all on in 2022. It's a bit scary.

[grav_ity]

MY BLURB IS ON THE FRONT COVER OF IRON WIDOW it's my first time on the front cover i am very pleased. :)

[st_aurafina]

I enjoyed it so much!

[naye]

It is proving to be a nice place to take my poor addled brain for a wee rest.
Yes! I got TikTok when I needed something to entertain/distract that demanded absolutely no brain power, and trained the algorithm to give me cute animal vids. It also branched out into service animals, which was very informative? I've also subscribed to some folk musicians, but apparently that doesn't really matter to the FYP which is still 95% animals. Excellent diversion, good for making me smile - and if the algorithm tries to make me watch other stuff I scroll away as quickly as I can.

[st_aurafina]

It also branched out into service animals, which was very informative?
I love the way it tries stuff out on you like that! I feel very fond towards the algorithm, actually. I know it's probably a commercial monster, but I think of it as an eager-to-please doggo.

It's been great through this last weird year.

[muccamukk]

Thanks for confirmation on the kissing book thing. I'll bump it up the list. Also a couple others that are by authors I'd bounced off before, but have been meaning to give a second look.

I actually did find The Martian to Broish, I think the reasonable accuracy of the science made the NASA culture being stuck in the 1960s stand out even more.

Hench comes with an extreme body horror warning. I was pretty mixed on it, but seem to be in the minority.

[st_aurafina]

I didn't mind The Martian as long as it was the dude on his own. The NASA culture just made me think about that song, 100 Tampons? Where the greatest minds of NASA sent a woman into space for a week, with 100 tampons, and asked if that would be enough. I just. Can't.

Hench comes with an extreme body horror warning. I was pretty mixed on it, but seem to be in the minority.
Thanks for the warning - I was fine, but I was glad to be ready for something. What a weird book, with some very strange pacing problems...

[cephy]

Hmmmmm I've been vaguely intending to read Iron Widow, perhaps I should look into that a bit more closely...

[st_aurafina]

It's not perfect, and there's definitely a lot of unexpected violence, but wow. What a fantastic, batshit ride.

[shanaqui]

- also, you don't see a f/m/m threesome that's, you know, actually a threesome. And they were adorable together. Soft and tender with each other, wielding angry death with everyone else. A lovely dynamic.

Right?! I got sent this in ARC format and fell completely in love. Also, because I read it in ARC with little prior information, I did not know it was going to skip the love triangle and go for the threesome, and I was thrilled.

Also mad I had no one to talk to about it yet, because it was an ARC.

[st_aurafina]

I did not know it was going to skip the love triangle and go for the threesome, and I was thrilled.

I was also thrilled!! We need more of it!

[reeby10]

Eventually we'll get it. I just hope that it's a long way off, and a variant that's a little closer to my definition of mild than the government's.

Yeah... It feels so inevitable we'll all get it at this point, but that doesn't make the prospect any less worrying. Or terrifying, really. Especially with how so many other people act like it doesn't even matter.

Sarah Gailey book! Sarah Gailey book! I've been trying to rec them to everyone I know bc I adore their books :D Upright Women Wanted is really good, though I've not been reccing that to most people first bc of what happens in the beginning. Like, I definitely still want everyone to read it, but like you said, warrants a warning. Anyway, glad you liked it! If you haven't read any of Sarah Gailey's other books yet, River of Teeth and Magic for Liars are my favorites.

[st_aurafina]

I am new to Sarah Gailey, and yes, I'm very excited! Everyone does seem to be suggesting River of Teeth, so that might be the way I go.

[redfiona99]

I don't follow tiktok (if that's even the right word) but from things shared via twitter, I do enjoy the videos/tiks/toks of https://www.tiktok.com/@mndiaye_97?lang=en if animal facts are your thing.

[st_aurafina]

Oh, yes, I do like his stuff! He's fantastically enthusiastic, and I love it.

[senmut]

Just dropping in to say hello!

[st_aurafina]

Hello hello! And lots of hugs!

[lurkingcat]

I too am having cognitive dissonance between what is happening all around me and what my government is telling... well everybody. I get that Omicron is milder than Delta but a milder version is still likely to knock battlehamster flat so I'm not exactly thrilled by the back to the office and no masks needed anywhere decision. I no longer have an office to go back to so we can continue to play it safe for a bit though. And we do at least currently have access to free rapid tests although I'm not convinced that will be the case for much longer

Thank you for the Iron Widow rec. It is in my very big To Be Read pile and I think I may give up on trying to read stuff in the order I bought it and see if my brain is ready for the whole making a choice thing again.

[tozka]

Adding the gay pirates book to my wishlist because it sounds fun! Also I have Witchmark on my TBR and keep forgetting about it-- I'll move it over to my Kindle ASAP since your review reminded me I actually have it, lol.

[adafrog]

*waves*

Yeah, the politicians are so not helpful.

I liked The Martian. A lot of the science was correct, which was fun for me.

Horrorstor! I have that book. It was a little weird, but definitely good. And a little almost realistic because those stores are mazes.

[tinny]

I didn't know there were horror stories set in furniture stores as a genre, but:

- The scariest parts were my mental flashbacks to getting lost in Ikea.

This is definitely real! :D

[thisbluespirit]

I just saw an old post with a comment from you and realised how long it had been since a post - so just a note to say that I hope you are okay. Or, you know, reasonably okayish. ♥

[st_aurafina]

<3 <3 <3 Hello, my lovely! I'm doing okay, just a bit burned out from the past couple of years, I think. Hopefully you're doing okay too?