st_aurafina: Rainbow DNA (global frequency)
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Title: Ten Things You May Not Know About Miranda Zero
Fandom: Global Frequency (comic by Warren Ellis)
Characters: Miranda Zero
Words: 526
Rating: G
Notes: Firstly, because I always forget to say this, and have to add it in later, [livejournal.com profile] lilacsigil beta read this for me, while making cake.

Secondly, here's a bit about Global Frequency, because apparently it's a small and obscure fandom, which is sad, because it's a great premise to work with. Global Frequency was a set of twelve stand-alone stories set inside an aid organisation called the Global Frequency, run by the enigmatic and indestructible Miranda Zero. Wikipedia classifies it as "rescue fiction".

[livejournal.com profile] lilacsigil has written two Global Frequency stories for [livejournal.com profile] comica_obscura, both featuring Aleph, the punk dispatch queen who co-ordinates the rescue operations that Miranda Zero hunts out. Check them out here: Babe in Toyland, a series of vignettes about Aleph and Saltwater, which is a classic rescue mission type story.



1. In her work for the Frequency and her work before that, Miranda Zero has been shot at least once on each of the seven continents, at both poles, and while traveling over two oceans. On assessing that statistic, she thinks that the hospitals in Paris have the best food, Sydney the best views, and Guam the prettiest nurses.

2. Sometimes Ms Zero likes to give her driver the afternoon off, and travel between meetings via the subway or metro or cable car. She finds it very satisfying to be jostled and crowded in amongst the people that she works to protect. She recruited #772 while on the Eighth Avenue line, after watching him correct a printing error in the cryptic crossword in the New York Times.

3. Miranda Zero finds lava lamps soothing, though this amuses her when she considers the number of alien incursions she has helped to repel. She finds the folding globules of oil tranquil and soothing: round, happy Rorschach blots.

4. Music: contemporary jazz.
Coffee: black and sweet.
Eggs: over easy.

Even so, breakfast is just not as satisfying in high orbit, thinks Miranda.

5. Ms Zero owns a house in a desert, which she visits too infrequently to call a home. In the square-fenced yard ambitiously described as a garden, she has gathered the scattered rocks and piled them into a haphazard rockery. Last summer, a snake claimed the knee-high pile of white stones as a nest, and laid a clutch of eggs. This is more comforting than it sounds.

6. Miranda Zero has been interrogated by experts, and coldly stared them down. She reminds herself of this many times while under the light in the dentist's chair, sweat prickling on her palms.

7. Some years ago, a long-term financial backer for the Frequency asked a favour of Miranda. He was very polite, a little embarrassed about it, and repeatedly emphasised that his monetary support was in no way contingent on Miranda's compliance. There seemed little harm in it, and she felt that their history of collaboration entitled him to a certain amount of indulgence, so she agreed. Now, from time to time, she receives an envelope with photographs of the man's feet, and she dutifully files them away in a box.

8. A persistent rumour circulates through the Global Frequency that Ms Zero once punched Prince Andrew in the face. This is not true. It was Prince Phillip, in the stomach.

9. It is easy to assume that Miranda dresses in black two-piece suits to make a statement of one kind or another, but she dresses simply for practical reasons: her line of work is often gore-spattered. It seems a shame to throw away a good pair of pants just because the jacket is spoiled.

10. Miranda Zero does not believe in ghosts, or any sort of afterlife experience. These phenomena can all be explained rationally, be it electromagnetic interference, gestalt hallucination, or a biochemical response. Ms Zero never speaks of the entity that addressed her in the Negev some years ago, although the other two Frequency agents wonder if its promises have come true for her as well.

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