My brain needs a hobo sign, tbh

[st_aurafina]

The Jehovahs just called on us, from which I take to mean that since we have moved, they haven't updated their hobo sign at the gate that says LESBIAN HOUSE. Thanks, lady, I love being told, on my own doorstep, that God loves me despite my choices in life. I asked her to try to be compassionate and then I closed the door on her. (ETA: lilacsigil has ordered us a couple of rainbow flag stickers, one for the mailbox and one for the front door of the pharmacy. We can make our own hobo signs.)


I'm not going to get my Winter Soldier fic finished before Civil War comes out, and it's making me queasy. I want to enjoy and squee over the trailers, but instead I feel guilty and anxious, which is a great mindset to try and write from. I have 60K, I need maybe 15K. I want it done. I like this story a lot, and I want to post it. Ugh.


So, obvs, I am super anxious. Everything is anxious-making. I am very tired and bored of this steam engine in my brain that runs all day and all night, churning out thoughts and feelings that are completely divorced from reality. Even more, I'm tired of knowing these fears are out of perspective and irrational, but still feeling them. It is such a waste of time. I have better things I could with this powerful, energetic, imaginative brain. /is trying to be positive about brain. It's a good brain. It's kept me alive for 45 years.


naye was talking about podcasts, and I am very into podcasts right now! Podcasts are awesome because they free up my hands so I can crochet or shred zucchini or do housework. But even more than that, a podcast puts a brake on my anxiety-based running dialogue with myself. I can't listen to my inner voice berating me when there's a voice in my ear telling me something I really want to know.

I'm going to link to naye's recs for fictional podcasts, because I agree with all of the recs, and listen to all of those stories (except for 'Alice isn't Dead' but it's queued.) ETA: Done and I'm never eating omelet again.

Here are some non-fiction recs:



- Dusted - Lani Diane Rich and Alastair Stephen, a husband and wife team, discuss Buffy (and now Angel) episode by episode. I don't always agree with their analyses (Alastair, stop defending Xander's shitty behaviour! Shut up, Lani, Jenny Calendar is amazing!) but I really enjoy the way they break down story structure and discuss the effectiveness of plot decisions, the direction, the acting.

- The Scot and the Sassenach - I clicked with the Dusted team enough to check out their Outlander podcast, and a couple of episodes in, I'm enjoying that, too.

- The Allusionist - a word play/etymology podcast. Helen Zaltzman is funny and clever, and this is an easygoing, light podcast. I usually listen to it in the morning when I'm just out of bed.

- Oh No Ross and Carrie - Ross and Carrie are skeptics who investigate spiritualism and fringe science by going in and experiencing it for themselves. They're currently in the middle of a multi-part series about Scientology. (I'm terribly worried they're going to get sued or disappeared over this, actually.)

- Mystery Show - Starlee finds answers mysteries that can't be solved with a bit of judicious googling, such as 'Why was Britney Spears photographed carrying a copy of my novel that tanked?' or 'What's the story behind this belt buckle I found?' Starlee says, in Belt Buckle, that she's not in the business of perpetuating whimsy, but she totally is. She's whimsical as all fuck, and I love her. There's only six episodes of this, but apparently the second season is in the works.

- Gastropod - Cynthia Graber and Nicola Twilley discuss food, with input from scientists and historians. For example, I did not know that there were scientists dedicated to the study of maple syrup: the production of it, the cultivation of trees, the chemical breakdown, the social impact of consuming it, the health benefits. I learned a lot about maple trees and syrup and how maple water is going to be the next big thing after coconut water. (Neither of which I have ever tasted.)

- 99% Invisible - This is a really in-depth history of things you'd never have thought to wonder about - the last episode was about the artist's model who posed for Beaux Arts sculptures all over New York. And I really liked the history of the Green Book, the travel guide that helped African American tourists to holiday safely in the Jim Crow era.

- Song Exploder - Artists dissect their songs, tell us about the various components and creative decisions that led to them. The episode before last, about K T Tunstall's 'Suddenly I See', is a good place to jump in. This is a short little podcast, easy to take in, technical enough to be interesting to me without being isolating. It's really interesting to listen to the whole song at the end, after picking apart the rhythm, backing vocals, bass.

- BBC Radio 4's A History of the World in 100 Objects - short and interesting, with many unexpected guests (such as David Attenborough fondling a stone axe, Madhur Jaffrey talking about the stone pestle passed down from her mother.) The soundtrack does have the world's breathiest flute, but I think of it fondly now. Very short episodes, with lots of online visual backup. This is a really good one to listen to in the car.

- BBC Radio 4's Great Lives - guests choose someone they're interested in or inspired by, and the host digs up an expert on that person, and everyone has a chat. It's fun and informative and easy going and a good one for listening to while doing housework. I can zone in and out, and not have missed anything too critical.



Oooh, oooh, look what sholio did: ssrconfidential, fic exchange for Agent Carter. *hurries off to join*

Comments

[out_there]

Oooh. Dusted sounds interesting. I should check that out.

[st_aurafina]

It's fun - I'd recommend skipping the first episode, when they're discussing the movie. I found that dragged a bit, but from the second ep, it's very good.

[ruuger]

The Jehovahs just called on us, from which I take to mean that since we have moved, they haven't updated their hobo sign at the gate that says LESBIAN HOUSE.

I used to wonder if the Jehovah's Witnesses were stalking me because they used to always come to my door whenever I was working from home, but after I was laid off I realised that they come over every single Thursday and I just usually happened to be working from home on Thursdays. I suspect they have me marked down as a dirty atheist in their records somewhere and are doing extra work to convert me because I never hear them ringing any other doorbells in my corridor...

[st_aurafina]

Every single Thursday, holy crap. I wish they'd do something that actually benefits the world with all that time. Like, go volunteer in a soup kitchen or something.

We have a sticker on the window now, it looks awesome.

[muccamukk]

Thanks for the links. I'm checking a couple of those out.

We got Witnesses out at one of our very remote lightstations; they came in a little boat. Fortunately for us (if not them), our assistant keeper was an profoundly ex-Catholic philosophy major, who was very happy to have someone to argue with about religion. They never did come back.

[st_aurafina]

I cannot believe they came in a little boat. THEY CAME IN A BOAT. Somehow that is hilariously earnest, and is nicely defusing my rage.

[retsuko]

Ugh, I hate it when religious types show up at the door like that. I try to be polite, but it's so freakng rude. I'm sorry you have bigots coming and bothering you. :[

When I lived in Japan, I still got the Jehovah's Witnesses (which is odd, since Christiianity is still rather rare there) but the first time it happened, I opened the door to find a single, very nice lady who, when I said I didn't want to talk about God but was happy to speak to her in English, enthusiastically wanted to speak to me in English about, well, almost anything. She'd show up once a month or so, we'd talk for about 10 minutes, she'd give me a copy of The Watchtower in English, and then leave. About 2 years into my stay, she revealed that I'd taught her son, and that he'd enjoyed his lessons. Then without warning, she didn't show up for six months, and the next time the Witnesses came, it was a man and a woman who didn't know where the nice lady had gone, and they must not have felt comfortable speaking to a foreigner because they never came back. I still miss that nice lady who respected my boundaries. :)

[st_aurafina]

I have to say, I'm finding people's stories about their encounters with similar people to be very healing. I'm glad you could help that lady practice her English!

[umadoshi]

lilacsigil has ordered us a couple of rainbow flag stickers, one for the mailbox and one for the front door of the pharmacy. We can make our own hobo signs.

Sounds like a good move. :/

I'm sorry you're dealing with anxiety like that. It's so frustrating and awful. *hugs*

[st_aurafina]

I have the sticker on the door now and it looks great - merry and decisive.

Yeah, anxiety blows. Brains are extremely faulty engines sometimes.

[alba17]

I know what you mean about brains. Sometimes I wish I could switch mine out for another one. I know what you mean about the Civil War trailer! I had all these plans for a big bang but now I’m like, well, should I even start it since the movie will change everything. It’s an AU, it doesn’t matter that much, but I’m afraid my enthusiasm will dim when we get new canon.

Thanks for the podcasts recs. I listen to them in the car or when I’m cooking by myself or on walks.

Also thinking I might need a prod to be productive, so I might check out the Agent Carter exchange.

[st_aurafina]

Podcasts are awesome! I hope you find something you like in the list.

Sign-ups are open for Agent Carter! I am excited.

[ayebydan]

I'm terrible with jehovas. I just point to the 'no cold calling/selling' badge and go 'that includes religion' and shut the door. But that is only if I don't notice their little magazine as they approach. They I won't answer in the first place. It is just rude to rock up to my door and try to tell me how to live my life and what I'm doing wrong and try sell a a religion.

I hope you get your fic done and it stops causing you anxiety. ♥

[st_aurafina]

I got my sticker and it looks very merry on the front door, so I'm going to point to that, if they ever come again. Hopefully it's a repellent.

I hope I get my fic done, too! I want to post it.

[silverr]

Oh, some of those podcasts sound marvelous!

One other one I've really enjoyed over the years is RadioLab. The hosts can be a bit -- I'm not sure what the right word is; it's certainly not bland -- but the topics they've done are rarely boring.

[st_aurafina]

I will definitely check out Radiolab - sometimes what I need when I'm winding down is something that's a little quieter in tone.

So many great podcasts out there!

[silverr]

Speaking of podcasts -- are you still listening to/liking Dusted? I'm up to ep 70 (I skip the AtS eps). Have picked up a few bits of trivia.

Also: I forgot to suggest The Moth (people tell stories) and Selected Shorts (people read short stories).

[st_aurafina]

Yes, I am still listening to Dusted but I'm way, way behind you! I just listened to the S2 episode with the costume store - I am very amused at their attempts to figure out how Ethan negotiated small business bureaucracy. I don't always agree with their character analysis, but I love the way they poke into the world building.

I have seen recs for The Moth go by - I will check it out, and also Selected Shorts.

[silverr]

I think a wicked drinking game could be made of the times one of them uses the phrase "absolutely adorable."

I don't agree with all of their character accessments either (I have been known to yell at the podcast), but they've brought up some interesting points now and again, and I've learned a few things here. For example, of all the times I've watched "Lie to Me" I never realized that the vamp she stakes at the very end of the ep is Ford (I'm actually surprsied that Spike kept his word to vamp him).

[adafrog]

I hear you on the anxiety. I'm having some issues with it right now, as well.

Some of those nonfiction podcasts sound very cool. Unfortunately I'd rather actually read. :)

[st_aurafina]

Ah but you can't read and do housework. Or at least, I can't. You might be magic!

[adafrog]

What is this *housework* that you speak of?

[vass]

Rainbow flags sound like a good idea, if they pay attention or are even sufficiently plugged into mainstream culture to know that rainbow == LGBT.

I could send you a copy of my "no salespeople, proselytisers, or velociraptors" sign for your door if you think it'd help. I saw a salesman approach my door once, start to knock, read it, and recoil. It was beautiful.

Or alternatively, I'll fight your JW if you want. ("I will drive to the Great Ocean Road and engage in fisticuffs with a cultist who insulted my friend" may seem less appealing to me tomorrow, but right now it's 2:21am and I have a headache and am angry with everyone involved in the US federal election, so she seems like a tempting target.)

[st_aurafina]

"I will drive to the Great Ocean Road and engage in fisticuffs with a cultist who insulted my friend"

Oh, bb, you're a bit awesome, do you know that?

I put the rainbow sticker on the door, and it's very cheery. I think it's going to work out - but if it doesn't, I'll go to Threat Level: Velociraptor.

[vass]

Oh, bb, you're a bit awesome, do you know that?

*checks shirt to see if it got spilled on me while I was eating dinner, which was awesome* Thank you.

And I forgot to mention, 'Gastropod' is an awesome name for a food podcast, and I once saw instant coconut water in the health food aisle at Colesworths. Just add water. I have so many questions.

Also, Lucas Scheelk's starting a podcast about autistic and autistic-coded characters in media, if that's something you'd be interested in. I've only listened to the introduction, but they're an autistic poet with a particular interest in Elementary.

[redcirce]

Sorry about the Jehovah's- I figure the only time that is ever fun is if you live in Minneapolis and Prince drops by.

is trying to be positive about brain. It's a good brain. It's kept me alive
The eternal struggle! I'm right there with you.

Oh no podcast recs! I have so many Doctor Who audio plays to finish, but I went and downloaded a bunch of them anyway. I actually have been meaning to listen to Alice Isn't Dead- did you enjoy it? Also, Dusted sounds fun, but I'm not sure I can handle dude's defending Xander after being in that fandom for years...

I made those chocolate zucchini muffins this weekend, by the way, and they were delicious!

[st_aurafina]

I think Prince is the only acceptable Jehovah - he's never proselytised in his music, unless Raspberry Beret has a whole other meaning.

I like Alice Isn't Dead but it's still on wobbly tracks a bit for me - you know how Nightvale can get a bit caught up in its own cleverness? Alice is doing that, but without the backlog of story to support it. I am going to keep listening to it for a while though, and see what shakes out of the pilot-ness of it.

Dusted got a lot, lot better - the guy says "I love Xander buuuuuut this is really kind of awful of him" a lot more now. But yeah, I'm mostly listening for the nostalgia, and for story analysis.

Rec me some Doctor Who audio plays! I've listened to 1-100, but then I took a little break and when I went back to Big Finish, there were approx a million different series and I don't know where to start. I tried one with Eight and Mary Shelley, but it didn't grab me. (Which - so disappointing! How can that not work? Mary Shelley should be an awesome companion.)

Yay muffins! They're so good. So brownie-ish.